Beta Blogger Blues - Poem by Ivan Donn Carswell

Have you switched to Beta yet?
It’s an even bet that if you have
you quite regret your impulse
to accept the canny invitation.

It’s okay, I hear you say, the crew’s
a clever team and give you confidence
they’ll solve the sorry logon glitch
and while a bitch to reach your Blog in Beta
functionality’s much neater
and the features seem to meet a need
that you’d imagine was a boon.

But to whom? It reeks of bells and whistles
programmers thrill to implement
and sells itself to raise the rent,
perhaps that’s not their main intent
but heaven sent as it would seem
what does do?

Have you tried to post some pictures,
worked through all the hidden strictures
governing acceptance of the size and features,
imagined how the placement looks upon
the page but nothing came, tried again,
and tried again, then given up and dumped
the goddamn thing and cursed your malcontent?

Today I managed something neat, a
feat imagined to defeat an agile mind,
I posted on a date I’d missed, the 6th
of August, and be blessed it worked!

What a jerk, I criticised the Beta form
for being reticent while it was me who
missed the point. But that’s as far I recant,
I’ve yet to post the goddamn pictures!
© I.D. Carswell