First time I dared propose, A callow lad was I; I donned my Sunday clothes, I wore my Old School Tie. Awaiting me Louise Was dolled to beat the band, So going on my knees I begged her hand.
Oh yes, she gave me her hand,-- A box upon the ear; I could not understand, I blinked away a tear. Then scornfully she said: 'Next time you kneel before A maid, young man don't spread Your hankey on the floor.'
So next time I proposed, Thinks I, I'll treat 'em rough. Her name was Lily Rose, I gave her he-man stuff. I yanked her on my knee, And as her ear I bit, To my amazement she Seemed to like it.
The old cave-men knew best; Grab girlies by the hair, And though they may protest Drag them into your lair. So young men seeking mates, Take my tip, if rejected: A modern maid just hates To be respected.